911

There is a distinct difference between panicking for no reason, and being in a situation that requires your fingers to dial "911".

Originally, I had planned to attend a Jewish Food Festival on Saturday, as I posted in my past blog. However, Saturday, the pouring rain dictated my activities a little more than I had anticipated.

I will just say this: "You make plans, and LIFE HAPPENS."

As it turns out, since this was my first "free" Saturday, after the bar exam, and the "Month of Hell" of my isolation. I rarely left this apartment, and although it is a beautiful place to live, secluding yourself with books and notes, studying your brains out, and not allowing yourself to socialize, makes for an even unrealiziable neglect for running of a household.

I succeeded in purchasing the bare necessities , and got the immediate bills paid. I had an entire month of living like Henry David Thoreau, except without the pond, and life in the woods. While like Thoreau, I lived in isolation.

The vast difference between Thoreau and me, and isolation is that he was studying the Great Thinkers of the Eastern World, in order to discover the fulfillment of a man's soul; I was studying the contemplation and application of English Common Law, and contemporary Statutory Law, I spent my time attempting to apply the intent of our Founding Fathers and the evolution of the applications in Statutory Law.

I approached my challenges as if I were an artist, sitting before a blank canvas, and equated each law as a distinct color of oil paint on a pallete. My brush was the application of all that seemed unmanageable in the beginning. I took each color (law), and individually applied it onto the canvas. As I progressed, I could see the need for the colors of the law to be applied in a manner which would blend each and every one into a masterpiece of a complete painting.

The colors in the painting were not my creation, but the task of the assembly the concepts and understanding each law individually and collectively, was mine.

People that share space in the world had become irrlevant to my life. They were simply not a factor to my existence; though, I knew they were "around"; however, in my world, existed only in concept.

Men are, in my observation, social beasts in nature, and their souls require community. We all seek to fulfill the desires of our deep seeded need of both expression, and reception. Extended periods of isolation creates insanity, not production. I was nearly ready to cut off my ear and call myself Van Gough, but instead, decided to go shopping at the local Dollar General....

You must keep in mind that I share yet another similarity of many of the great thinkers: no money.

But, I was running out of the necessities and had to get out. Surprisingly, the time spent inside of the store was extremely stimulating and exciting for me. I saw things through new eyes. I was fascinated. I looked at as many people and things as I could. I eagerly engaged conversation with many of the elderly individuals shopping there, along with me, out of necessity. I shook hands with men who spoke with me about their wives, children, grandchildren, and most importantly, their churches.

After about three hours in the store, I realized I was exhausted and purchased a little more than I had intended.....

I loaded my car, and slid into the driver's seat, put the key in the ignition, checked the cell phone for messages (none), and turned on some John Mayall to gain comfort for my soul. Mayall's various songs while soothe me, also illustrate his musical talents. I continue to be fascinated by his gifts.

In a flash of my life, I hear a blaring car horn that doesn't stop. I turn my head to the right and see a vehicle that had crashed into the side of the Dollar General Building.

I do not hesitate to get out of my car upon the realization that the smoke I see through the pouring rain is eminating from the car. I see a man assisting a woman out of the car. She can't stand up straight. She is falling, he is trying to keep her ambulatory, with little success.

I call 911. "We need an ambulance immediately! There has been an accident. A vehicle has crashed into the side of the building."

The operator responds, "Is there an injury?"

"YES! YES!" I respond.

I spent the next hour of my life on the accident scene instructing the woman to keep her eyes open, and to my horror, realize another vehicle was invovled and there were two other women trapped behind their aribags.

I yell at the first woman, "Stay with us! Stay with us! I have called the ambulance! Hear the sirens? They are on their way!"

I talked with the witnesses, the hurt people, the paramedics, the firemen, the police. Finally, I was released from the scene. Afterall, I did not see the accident happen.

I quietly walked away without notice. I was again alone, but this time, I knew why I was there. I had a purpose, regardless of how small it may seem.

Jewish Food Festival

This weekend, our city is hosting a Jewish Food Festival. If I have ever eaten Jewish food in my life, I am not sure that I realized that was the case.
Is there anybody in the world who could recommend what Jewish foods I should try, to optimize my dining pleasure? Or, should I just stay home???
I have no idea here, and any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

KHARMA HAPPENS

Yeah, it is true. Kharma happens. So, let's think about all of the good things we have done in this life and all of the bad. Whew. Okay. I think about it often.......
The Bar Exam ended today. After two 1/2 grueling and exhausting days, I dare anybody to say anything to me. Glad I live alone these days! Otherwise, I would probably be in the process of doing so....
Monday morning was all state specific essay work. Although you get to write your answers in these booklets you are given, there never seems to be enough space, and I am left handed. I am accustomed to printing my words....Anyway, I wrote front and back of the pages with my answers and got down to the last page. There is no way to really allow anybody to understand what type of serious challenge this is, unless you have participated in attempting to say what you have to say in limited time and space. (I hate restrictions...)
Oh, I just had an idea, maybe I am living on the wrong plane. The Valedictorian of one of the local, private high schools (that professes to have 100% college placement-the high school not the guy), ended up being a buddy of mine in college. We knew each other briefly in high school, and even less in college, but that is another story. Anyway, one day I just asked him what it was like to be so smart?! I was like, "Man, do you even know how brilliant you are?" He never studied. He never had to, and was a member of Mensa. I never even heard of Mensa until I met him....
Basically, he informed me that I should try acid. "It puts you on an entirely new plane." He informed me. WHA????
Okay, I never did acid. Maybe that is what is wrong with me now. Just kidding. The concept, however, perplexes me to this day.

Back to my original train of thought. Sorry.
Anyway, I wrote so much on Monday, and in alot of ways, it was a great feeling, to realize that you can write so much about the law. Afterall, it has not been an easy road for me to get here, and as far as the bar exam goes, it ain't my first dance, if you catch my drift. It was great to expel all of the information about legal theories that had been clogging up my brain for all of these months...
So, the day was fairly fine, and then, I went and hung out some Monday afternoon, reviewing my notes, but at the same time, trying to maintain calmness. Took the dog for a walk, and caught up on doing laundry, etc. (I know, strange, but doing laundry really makes me feel kind of good.)
Then, before I realized it, I was scrubbing little tiles on my bathroom floor, (by hand). Obsessive? Maybe.....I couldn't help it, I simply got caught up in scrubbing things around the apartment!!! I started washing down the cabinets.......
To be honest, the cleaning got a little out of hand, but that is not really interesting....
Okay, then, after I finally got to sleep that night, after studying for a few more hours, I was very rudely awakened by a booming male voice outside of my apartment. (No, it wasn't anybody for me...)
By the way, I don't live in a bad area of town, but things get crazy here sometimes, because it is sort of a college type neighborhood....(I wanted to feel young again, so I moved to this side of town last year.) You have to take the good with the bad, you know.
Anyway, so this dude, who is in a band that plays raggae, which is really very cool, in my opinion, was in the hallway yelling at his girlfriend. He was, very surprisingly, DRUNK!!!!
I opened my front door to just check on her on one hand, and on another hand to subtly REMIND them that I am in the middle of taking the bar exam, not drinking at the bar!
NOT that many people really care, especially when they are drunk. I realize this.
So...at about 1:30 a.m., after I asked if things were okay, he proceeded to insult a part of my body, and categorized me in a generally non-friendly way.
All I could say, at the top of my lungs, is "Oh HELL NO, you DIDN'T JUST GO THERE WITH ME."
So, I threatened jail time, and things got quiet again.
I try to be cool most of the time, and understand....because I have been young once, and I have been drunk once.....
But, this was not the time to be messing with me.
I had to get up really early the next morning, or late, as the case had it, and fought the rain and fog AND traffic across town to the testing center, which happened to ironically be in a church.....
So, I want to know what happens when you get about 500 lawyer wanna be's in a church all at one time..
Okay, Okay. Let's be nice....
The next day was to be a full 6 hours full of essays. Don't be fooled when I tell you that there were only six questions....There is a thing called "subparts".
I was signing in and I passed this guy sitting in his seat, early and obviously extremely nervous (his knuckels were very white), and he had about twenty gel writers lined up right in a row, on his table. I had two pens. I said, "Hey man, we know who to go to if we run out of ink."
I must admit the night before, I took my gel writers apart in order to check the ink...He responded, "You know it is your worst nightmare, running out of ink in the middle of the bar exam."
We shared a brief laugh, and then, I smiled for about the next ten minutes, worrying about his future as a lawyer, so nervous like that going into a courtroom. I surmized that experience would give him his first heart attack.
So, to make a long story, even longer...
In the middle of the second hour, I ran out of ink in my first pen. I AM NOT KIDDING YOU.....So, I briefly panicked and then patted myself on my back, figuratively, for brining a back up. I began writing with my backup pen, and the ink appeared to be in the pen, but nothing came out. I was scratching my answer. Oh man.
And, keep in mind, you just can't go up to somebody and ask to borrow a pen during the exam. You have to ask your proctor.
He supplied me with a crappy little pen that didn't write very nicely either, but at least you could see some semblance of ink...
I was so upset, but I continued to write.
My plan for lunch that day became a mission to go find a replacement ink pen "cartridge" since I could not eat. (I haven't eaten a meal in the past month and can't even remember what it was.) My diet has been abruptly changed to "safe foods", granola bars and crackers, oh and Sprite.
Okay. So, I go to Walgreens to find this ink pen cartridge....Come to find out, they don't carry them. Not just the one to fit in my pen, but not at all. Pencil leads, yeah. Hundreds of them.
Broke as I am these days, it is quite significant. In fact, I haven't even had any fancy coffees in weeks....other than real coffee, which I do love by the way.
The remaining experience followed the same, and then, at the end of my second day, my shoulders and back hurt so bad that I had to make an emergency call to my chiropractor. Thankfully, he is a wonderful man, and was happy to see me, even though I didn't have an appointment. I got an adjustment, and started crying in his office, telling him that he was the only person who made me feel special these days and that I really appreciated him. (Oh my goodness.)
I was in desparate need of Advil today. In fact, my head was pounding so hard, I figured everybody in the testing area could hear the throb or see my veins popping out of my head. I started talking to a girl I don't know and said, "Hey, would you happen to know anybody who might have an Advil or something?" I felt like a drug dealer. I am not really accustomed to asking people for things like that, but...I was really in serious peril.
It just so happens, she actually had some, so she hooked me up with some Advil Sinus, and I had to ask, "It is not nighttime, is it?" Well, DUH! She is right there with me taking the same test.
I felt really great about my Kharma at that moment, because as soon as I swallowed those two magic little pills, the headache dissipated and the day somehow came to an end.
Whew. I am really exhausted. Gotta get some sleep!
Besides that, I can't feel two fingers and my thumb on my right hand. Gotta go see the chiro again tomorrow...At least he will be nice.

Just a Yankee Living In The South

I don't tell many people that I am from Ohio. I don't know why it doesn't come up too often, but sometimes it might explain why I am the way I am.
How am I? You may ask.
Somehow, just different......

Don't get me wrong, I have embraced the "Southern Way". In fact, I have the accent to prove it! This is one of the first lessons that I learned when I moved here: "If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then it has to be assumed that it is a duck." So to speak.

One thing that I have noticed is my attitude about unions. I have never worked for a union, in fact, I have worked for places that post warnings of what to do if you are approached by a union official. The instructions were in bold and said, "We are not affiliated with a union. If you are asked to join a union, seek out a manager and report the incident IMMEDIATELY."

I have family members who have worked for union supported industries for years, and have reaped benefits as a result. The only drawback I have seen is that if the company you work for goes on strike, and you don't cross the picket line, you don't get paid and you of course, cannot work. Realistically, if you have to make a living to either support yourself, or your children, you could be in a pickle.

My take on unions is that they serve their purpose. Now, the affiliation with organized crime does concern me a little bit, well, for my family members who belong to a union. I have visions of riots, and the appearance of Haffa, but come on...this is quite an impossible realization, isn't it?

Unions have one goal that appeals to me, protection of the worker. Have you ever been fired? Just told one day "It is not working out, sorry." I have to say that experience makes you feel like the floor beneath you has just collapsed. Yeah, I have worked for some pretty sorry folks. You get a huge bonus one week, and the next week, you are sent packing. No thanks. Keep your stupid bonus and just be straight with me. Tell me what is on your mind. What is bothering you? I know that I am a hard worker, but for some reason I tend to drive managers bonkers.

Why? I guess I have to admit that I am a little gruff. If something is on my mind, I say it, most of the time. One time, a manager told me that he did not like the expression on my face. This same manager again, a few weeks later, began yelling uncontrollably. I thought he was going to have a heart attack as a result of the level of stress he was obviously experiencing. While I was focusing on how to determine the very moment I would have to dial 911, he started yelling at me because I wasn't crying. Crying? Are you kidding me? You are about to have a meltdown, about I don't even know what, and you are mad because I am not crying? I cry at sad movies, when I fall down and skin my knee. I don't cry when you are making yourself look like a fool.

I don't date well. What I mean by this is that when I am thinking something, oftentimes, I say it. If you are an idiot, I guess I will tell you. I don't really care if you don't like what I have to say. So, just give me a good book, and leave me alone.

Being alone is not so bad. I don't have to deal with the mental game playing that I have discovered many men enjoy playing. Example, I say, " Oh, I love that song." He changes the station. I dress in slacks to go with him to his parent's house. He says, "Why don't you just wear blue jeans like the rest of us?" I say, "Buy me a pair that fits me." He says, "We are going to dinner, so please be cool." I say, "Cool is my middle name." And, then, I grab the napkin and tuck it in my shirt at the table. Hey, it keeps food from messing up my outfit. Get a clue.

MONEY

MONEY. Nobody has enough of it. I need more of it. How about you? I could use some today, that is for sure. Why? I could find a good use for it. I would love to eat a filet mignon. Too bad. Not today. A filet will have to be eaten another day.

MONEY. Don't misunderstand....money is not the root of all evil. The LOVE of money is the root of all evil and will surely land your soul in hell for all eternity. I learned this from a t.v. evangelist that I happened upon the other day. Suddenly, my guilty feelings associated to the greenbacks subsided. I know that I have read it in the Bible, but just hearing it verbalized, makes such a stronger impact to me somehow.

So, how do I make more? Oh, and how to stop spending it?????

The people I know that actually do have "plenty" and even "enough" are extremely frugal. They respect it. My parents tried and tried my entire life to instill the characteristic of frugality:

"Turn off the lights!"

"Don't you touch that thermostat!"

"Close the door! Were you born in a barn?"

Kids, hear me now, your parents are not on the earth simply to harrass you. They are not dumb, or just trying to make your life a living hell; quite the contrary, they are trying to save you from yourself.

If I had only listened to what they were saying, instead of spending that time thinking up my own smart alec remarks, such as :

"What lights? I live in darkness."

"I am not touching it, I am just adjusting it so I don't freeze to death."

"I was too young to remember where I was born, although my birth certificate says Akron, Ohio; but Jesus was born in a manger, and I don't hear any complaints there."

I should have been slapped. I guess if my parents were terrible and had violent tempers, I would have been.......

Unfortunately, as I sit here alone in adulthood, I have to admit that I verbalized at least each of them....at least once. Mom, dad, I am sorry.

In conjunction with my parent's teachings and a hearty dose of reality (LIFE), my attitude has finally been adjusted.

No, money does not grow on trees, at least none that I can find anyway. There are even money trees, as my mother once taught me; however, they haven't solved my problems. I certainly checked out my secret hunch out though, (there had to be money somewhere as a result of that tree), as a youngster, I spent much of my spare time searching in vain for quarters (even pennies) on the ground beneath the tree. From time to time, I still sneak a peek beneath the ground hoping to find a dollar or two.

It happens to be that I have even gone as far as disgracing my parents with embarrassment and disdain when I pulled into their driveway shortly after the purchase of my very own BMW 328i, a couple of years ago....Okay! Okay! I know. STUPID purchase, and boy, what a mistake. Thankfully, I sold it (for a profit) to another sucker, hoping to find happiness with that horrible bundle of trouble.

Mom, dad, you are right, you have always been right, and I am sorry.

Years after selling the Beemer, that didn't make me sexier, happier, or any of those things that I thought it would do, today, I find myself proudly shopping at the local Dollar store.

I have discovered the horrors of coming home after work to find that water does not just naturally disperse from the tap....that when the lights are not properly and promptly turned off when not in use, and you haven't paid that bill, they refuse to "light up your life". I have learned that cable t.v. is not a necessity, but a luxury. Telephones, well....you can live without them, believe it or not.

SOME OTHER HELPFUL HINTS: Toilet paper...can be purchased for about 60 cents from your local grocer, as long as you get the single ply, single role. As a single individual, that single roll can last a mighty long time, as long as you are frugal with the number of sheets you tear off at one sitting. The scratchiness, well....as is life, you just have to deal with it!

Shirtsleeves can be used to wipe your nose, but just don't do it in public. (No, mom, I don't really do this.)

Gas stations do accept change, and who cares if the clerk smirks at you or becomes impatient. The people in line behind you can do one of two appropriate things, keep their mouths closed and be patient, or just say whatever they want to, and slip you a few bucks....

Paris Hilton! YIKES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Please tell me the attraction to this untalented, cover girl for anorexia!
If I hear somebody refering to Paris, it had better be the CITY and reference to The Eiffel Tower!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AM I HAVING A MELTDOWN?

Seriously, if anybody knows what men see in this chick, please let me know, as my friends and I are just curious.

FOCUS

"When you look at yourself from a universal standpoint, something inside always reminds or informs you that there are bigger and better things to worry about." -Albert Einstein

Albert Einstein was introduced to me on a hot summer day in my fourteenth year of life, during a visit to our nation's Capitol.

Sadly, I realized that shaking his hand and sitting down for coffee was an impossible dream!

However, I hear his voice in my mind loud and clear. On a clear day, I can even see him sitting on a bench in the park, slouched over, dressed in his slouchy sweatshirt, pipe hanging out of his mouth, furiously jotting down ideas on a tablet.

While in Washington D.C., many years ago, my uncle took my sister and me to visit the phenomenal statue in his honor. I distinctly remember it had been raining earlier that day, so my sister and I kicked off our shoes, and joyously splashed toward the magnificent copper replica of our hero. It was most impressing that this genius was memorialized dressed in his trademark baggy sweatshirt, and tussled white hair. http://www.planetware.com/picture/washington-d-c-/washington-albert-einstein-memorial-us-dcae.htm

Was Einstein a sad man? My sister and I took turns climbing up into his cold, hollow, copper lap. "He looks sad." I said. As long as I live, I will never forget that day, the pure joy I felt, with my sister and uncle, face to face with the man responsible for the birth of atomic energy.

Can you believe that Einstein lived most of his life broke and hungry? Money did not mean much to him. He was engrossed in work. He was Focused.

Like most Americans, I measure success by my possessions. I sadly attempt to balance the checkbook and recall the theory I learned in math class long ago: "a million times zero, equals zero." Wow, out of all theories I learned.....it had to be this one that applies to my life!!!

I am honored to be admitted to the February Bar Exam, which begins on Monday. The test is a marathon...a test of your will.....a test that will engage everything you may have in your brain until 5:00 p.m. on Wednesday afternoon.

I personally have invested many years of my life preparing to pass the bar exam. Unlike Einstein, money does mean something to me and so far, I haven't made much.......

When I was in high school, I ran hurdles. My left lead leg had to clear the bar while my right leg was tucked tightly behind my hip. Of course, I hit the bar over and over again, and of course, fell and knocked over more hurdles than I can recall. After each humiliating fall, I pulled my body up and away from the asphalt, overcame the embarrassment of the failure, stretched the legs out and ran the hurdles again and again. I was physically prepared to clear any and all hurdles. My enemy was my own thoughts and the doubt of my abilities that caused my falls. I know that now. I lacked FOCUS.

Einstein once was rejected from a college, [due to deficiencies in languages and the natural sciences] (People: A History of Our Time).....He regrouped, and proceeded with his life, continuing to progress the various theories that essentially changed the world. He FOCUSED. Einstein was not the type of man who was interested in gaining money, or recognition. He was interested in solving problems, and unlocking the mysteries of life.

Today, I spent many hours of my life concentraing on pointing my left toe. I tucked my right leg tightly under my right hip. I ran, jumped and cleared not one, but all of the tall hurdles. I felt the total and complete satisfaction of flying through the air, as far as I wanted to go.....I must admit, it felt GREAT!

The test is Monday. Today, I closed my eyes, and I saw myself opening the letter congratulating me....taking the oath to uphold the Constitution of the United States, and promising to respect justice. I visualized the day that is long awaited, and saw myself proudly walk to the front of the auditorium to receive my license to practice law. I was born to change the world. All it takes is a little bit of FOCUS.

Valentine's Day

Well, I am duly impressed. My dad out-did himself, in his BLOG, entitled "Valentine's Day", and discussed, of course, my dear, sweet, loving mother (mom, honestly, this is satire, I promise).......Forever prolific, Dad sneaks in his innate scholarly approach to this nauseatingly mushy holiday tribute, and gives readers some excellent tips on marriage.

Dad shares his wisdom and thoughtfully includes a handy:

"Gift Giving Guide To Your Spouse Of 30+/-Years".

I truly felt sentimental pangs about his tribute to a specific and memorable past "holiday" gift my father proudly presented to his bride. "THE SAW", I will call it. I remember the day that he bravely and proudly presented to my mother a token of his love and what I feel I must admit to be an illustration of a moment of pure insanity! What was he THINKING????

More frighteningly, she LOVED it. (Fodder for an upcoming CSI episode, I am afraid).

Hey, wait a minute! Although, I realize he purchased the saw for her on a Valentine's Day gone by, I have to wonder if this was no more than his ultimately morbid attempt at becoming famous (or infamous). Once I do a little investigating into what he gave her today, I will have a better idea of what is going on in this family I proudly call my own. Does he want to be featured on "Nancy Grace"?

I hope that he is NOT tempting fate, or more likely testing some crazed scientific experiment in human nature and family relations all in an attempt to simply prove some theory.

I hope he did not accidentally read the wrong experiment notes and mistakenly turn to the pages about testing the theory that "Hell Hath No Fury As A Woman Scorned"....

Some days, I wonder if my mother or my father are feeling scorned or maybe just generally irritated. Maybe it is only when I show up to visit??? Hmmmm.......

I am still quite upset that I require the employ of a Wind-Talker when trying to figure out the shopping list on the chalkboard. What is going on over there, anyway? I am terrified to discover the truth.......

You see, both of my parents, and, come to think of it, frighteningly, my siblings all enjoy viewing a wide variety of freaky, bloody, and gory, bizzare movies that attempt to scare the beejeebies out of the innocent viewer (my family refers to these movies as "CLASSICS"). (Thankfully, I escaped any real psychological damage as a result of the exposure!)

Be careful gentlemen shoppers!!! Please, Please, heed my advice:

Consider this: THOUGH it IS true, chocolate is loaded with enough calories and fat to, ah...how to put this gently...to enhance your wife's profile....you will probably be a happier man purchasing a lovely assortment of candy!

Now, enough of that, and down to some personal business, "Honey, WHERE'S MY CANDY BAR???"
Oops! I forgot.........not married.....

More Musings

At 3:11 a.m., I would like to formally thank my favorite local coffee shop for this insomnia.....with all of my heart...

......in addition to all of the donations from depths of my chronically empty pocket book.

Speaking of the coffee shop.....my study coach, (who happens to be a lawyer) met me at our local "watering hole" last week. (As I said before, it is a lifestyle, comparable to the tag on my formerly charged, once expensive and stylish suit coupled with the lingering scent of, again, formerly charged, expensive perfume). I have to sadly admit that our support is growing into the obscene average of three or four times a week these days....wonder if we can appear on the show "Intervention"? I can visualize my thirty minute episode and me on my knees, begging, "please forgive me, I was just an addict...I didn't even realize what I was doing." By the way, where is the COFFEE in my sweet, caramel, espresso treat, anyway?

Something slightly notable actually occured to us last week at the coffee shop. We were minding our own business, scoping out our choice of unsuspecting men (hopefully single, yes, and wealthy). While slurping down my fix, I observed that neither my friend nor I could resist the subtle magnetic pull of a not overly attractive, yet familiar man on the bench, scanning a paper, over by the window. Who is he, anyway?

His poised, rehearsed presentation demanded our glances, as he commenced to capture the subtle attention of other customers in the shop. I even caught some of the employees eyeballing him.

I afforded the vaguely familiar, mystery man in the room, a yawn and intentional, unimpressed glance. He was blatantly awaiting "adoring" fans. Frankly, I personally wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of acknowledgement. Give me a break, I wasn't even sure who he was. You do have to consider those people in the world who simply resemble notable, famous and quasi-famous people. Was he a news anchor?

I found myself momentarily tempted to submit to my curiousity; however, I opted out. I noticed he wasn't eating or drinking anything!

The next morning, while driving to the office, it HIT me....the man was one of our quite recent, former public officials! Not only that..he is running again this year. Wait a minute, could he have been trying to get votes? Surely not. Please, please call his campaign manager..this will not get him back in office.

.....the tragedy of the uneventful, yet somewhat mind-warping, "quasi-brush with fame" is that by the time both of us (coach) were born, the residue of the smoke filled rooms from the '60's had subsided. What luck, eh? Here it is, the truth, and I gotta say it..... our fuzzy head syndrome is resulting from the massive caffeine consumption. Oh yeah.

Okay, okay, before I sign off today, I want to briefly revisit my former post. I previously suggested that our nation consider the implementation of public hangings. The observation was simply intended to explore the possibilty of utilizing our state-funded executions in a public forum..deterrence could become reality.

Beccaria once said, "It is better to prevent crimes than to punish them."

I am leaving you with a link to yet another addiction of mine, the Nancy Grace show: http://www.cnn.com/CNN/Programs/nancy.grace/

A Day In The Life of "A Lawyer To Be"

What is today? I mean, what day of the week? What is the date? I am lost. Will I ever be found? I am not too sure.

My head is full of useless information. Let me take that back, it is filled with information only useful on the upcoming Bar Exam, which is in less than two weeks.

Don't ask me my name, where I live, what I drive, my dog's name, my parent's names....and don't even ask me for my rank and serial number. Upon the moment a brave soul inquires as to any of the information formerly cited, I am liable to flip out. (Have you ever seen anybody flip out before? Well.....I promise, I can do a good illustration. Been there, done that.)

This morning, I awoke at a somewhat normal hour, about 9:00 a.m., I believe. Not really sure. I got to bed early last night, well...uh...earlier than usual on this abnormal study, no work, and minimal play schedule.

I began the day with reviewing all of the material that came in my admissions packet. For those of you who do not know what I am talking about....(all of you non-lawyers out there)......it is a packet that provides the test taker with their secret number and admission certificate, which has to be presented each time you enter the testing facility.

The notes told me the expected schedule and I found our that the first day of testing is only 1/2 day. Whew!!!! But, then I began to review the subjects that will be tested and whether they will be in essay format or what I like to refer to as "choose it or lose it". By the way, I personally HATE the multiple-choice format, which is also the multi-state format. (That means, the questions are supposed to be universal-not state specific.)

The entire law school and subsequent bar exam process reminds me of learning and speaking a foreign language. It is just so...."foreign".

Hey,honestly, it has taken me just about six months to understand the whole "coffee lingo", or what others like to call "style of living" code at my local coffee house. (I feel like I need a windtalker there to help me de-code). After numerous, unsuccessful, blustering attempts, I have learned what I am supposed to say in order to get what I want.

These days, I confidently lean out my car window and speak fluent coffee lingo into the drive-up microphone:
"Yes, I would like a Venti (good bar exam term), Caramel Machiato, extra Espresso, extra syrup, add whip (never add "cream"-they will realize you are secretly not cool), please."

My goodness, who invented this language? How about just asking for a "legal stimulant, with extra runny sugar, a little spice and everything nice."

Oh, and one shan't forget "make it hot and not frozen."

Heaven forbid you ask for a "large", because you will indelibly get a "small" coffee. Oh, and by the way, is there really coffee in these drinks? Come to think of it, when I place an order, I don't recognize a single word that resembles "coffee".

Okay, moving on.... This morning, I will admit, I began to weep. I did not just tear up, and I did not cry, I began weeping. Why? I don't know. My mom would say, "Oh, stop feeling sorry for yourself." I guess that I had an epiphany that I NEED to work. I guess I know now why there is a show called Desperate Housewives. If I was a house-wife, I would desperately be trying to find a job, so I could get out of the house! Honestly, I have a new found respect for those women who are housewives. I don't know how they manage.

Since I chronically and acutely broke, the lack of finances leave me with very limited choices as to how to spend my time. (Although, I did manage to get some "coffee". Afterall, I thought it might cheer me up.) My choices today were to either go to the library, another depressing room with four walls to look at, stay at home and look at the four walls coming in on me here, or hey....wait a minute!---GO TO WORK!

I am so excited! I went to the office today. Ah, I was so joyously HAPPY to be in my office again, sitting at my desk, talking on my phone, working on my computer. Reviewing cases!! Wow. I was so happy! When 5:00 rolled around, I did not even realize that it was time to leave.

Okay, am I sick , twisted, or what? Who in a million years would do what I insanely did? Go to work when you don't have to? I decided to make some calls to people running for office this year. We are, as a firm, examining some of the political options since this is an election year. I talked to some folks, and asked them to drop by the office to let us know about their campaigns. I called up some buddies of mine on that "circuit" and chatted it up. I was happy to do it! I am excited about what can be achieved this year. The phone calls truly got my blood pumping! Honestly, I am in my element when I talk politics. It is something that at times I am frustrated by, but afterall, that is what gets things done in this town. I was, afterall, a poly-sci major. In fact, it was assumed by my friends that I was preparing to go to law school....enough people started talking to me about it, that I decided to check it out.

Currenlty, I am back at home, my loyal dog curled up by my side, as I am consumed with reviewing notes for about the zillionth time, and wanting to barf every time I look at the material.

My only saving grace is this Jimi Hendrix: Band of Gypsies, DVD playing vintage concert footage, and I become one with the astounding harmony that can tame the surliest of beasts.

Prison Overcrowding

My favorite comment about lawyers comes from Shakespeare, when Henry VI says, "The first thing we do, is kill all the lawyers." Listen, I am here to tell you, we are not all that bad. And, realize we can quickly become your very best friend and trust me, from experience I know this is true: the most called person when you are in a pickle or just locked up and bored.

I must confess that I personally have yet to earn a very significant piece of paper, actually the most important one of all (my license), yeah, I know....But, I served my time, and survived law school, i.e. "boot camp", and I serve clients every day, assisting the lawyers I work for and helping those accused.Okay, enough of that. The title of this Blog is "Prison Overcrowding".

What can the future hold for management of the incarcerated? Now, every person I have ever confronted sitting on the other side of the bars from me, tells me that they "didn't do it". Okay, Okay, I don't care! I am not the judge or the jury! My concern is what to do with the ever growing population in the prison system.

I am very depressed about this significant problem that doesn't get the attention it needs.I will disclose this fact to you.....I was a Clinton supporter, and I think, supporter or not, we can all agree that he did ALOT while he was in office. I respect his intellect and appreciate many things he accomplished in office. And, although, for the time being, disbarred, he is still an extremely busy man....Let's face it, the man makes more money at one speaking engagement these days than I will every earn in my entire life. But, please tell me this, isn't he the one who came up with the "three strikes, you're out" policy? MANDATORY SENTENCING-My response? "Yikes!!!!!!"In theory, mandatory sentencing is great, for those of us who are not supporters of violent crime. I bet that you have unfortunately either have been a victim of crime, ....or, you know somebody who has.

What ever happened to public hangings? I think that a couple of those would shake things up. Don't you think that people might stop and think before they leave the house to go kill somebody? I really don't know anymore, truth be told. I think that too many people snap these days. I am just not too sure who or what to blame it on, either. Hormones injected into cows? Environmental pollution? Television? The fact that minimum wage will buy you a trip to the welfare office because you can't eat, and you are subsequently told you make "too much money"? How much can you sell crack for these days on the street? You tell me. I would honestly love to know.What will it take to put the fear of punishment into a person so that they will stop and think? It is an issue that I am tormented with every day of my life. Hey, it is what I do.

Some people sell cars, I think about crime. For those of you who relate better on economic terms, let's not forget that the state penal institutions are funded by your money. Anyway, apparently there has been a jail riot...in Los Angeles today!! ---46 people injured, and one dead. The Superbowl was today. Did you realize that there was yet another jail riot?

A Criminology professor of mine once explained a a theory about prisons overcrowding in the U.S. If you build more prisons, they will just fill up as fast as they are constructed. There are millions of people incarcerated and the number continues to escalate----out of control.So, let's think about the non-violent offenders for a minute or two. Let's think about those individuals who made a mistake or two, but really...their crime(s) can be compared to things you and I may do each day, but they got caught. Or simply accused. Some people sitting in prison were simply in the wrong place at the wrong time, and out of those millions incarcerated, there have to be some people who honestly "didn't do it". (Those are usually the people who don't make that claim....but, maybe that is why they are behind bars?)

Anyway, I don't know what to do to solve this overcrowding problem, but I don't see anything good happening anytime in the near future. There are too many people who do not want change, and in my opinion the prison system needs a complete overhaul. Let's figure out how non-violent offenders can pay their debt to society and get back to living! We all make mistakes. Hey, maybe we could get Oprah on this problem?

Tuesday

My dad read my blog, and liked it. I am glad that I was able to write it. I just started to write, and the story evolved. I wish I had time to write books, but right now I am working on getting my career on track. The Bar Exam is in less than two weeks. I am making trips to both my favorite coffee house and the library at a local campus.

It is so wierd to be back on a college campus. I actually began my educational career there, oh..so many years ago. And, How Time Flies! I feel so old when I look into the faces of those young kids. I wonder how old they are, because to me, none of them look old enough to drive, or vote! Since I started college at that campus, I transferred to a different college, then graduated, and moved on to Law School. Since then, I have worked in the environmental field, moved onto clerking for a Judge, and then learning how to practice law. My mom says it is funny to her that lawyers are always "practicing". "Can't they get it right?" She inquires. Ha. Ha. She jabs at me alot. She really enjoys it. I believe through the years, I have learned how to self-protect and jab back. In my family, it is sport. Who is on their toes? Rarely me.

The field of law is very challenging. I love it! I absolutely love all of the issues that we are faced with in our office from day to day. I love going to court. I don't always love the way the judge's rule. I understand that often, rulings are political. In my job, you have to always determine the other side's agenda, as there is always an agenda. Don't be fooled by thinking that can't be possible.

When I go to work in the morning, each day, I pass a government subsidized housing project. There is a black man, who never appears to be particularly happy, standing on the street, in the same place, right before you go under the underpass. He sells newspapers. He is out there in the sweltering summer heat, and in the bone chilling cold. He is working. Every morning, I have the urge to stop my car and tell him that I appreciate that he works every day without fail. I know that selling papers is not easy, and he doesn't earn too much money, but the fact is that he is working and I respect that. Across the street from where he stands, there are usually a few kids gathered, plotting the trouble they are going to get into that day. They look bored. I wonder if they are employed. I wonder if they are in school; doing something with their lives. I want to stop and talk to the kids, too. I don't know what I would say.

Maybe I would tell them that I have worked since I was fifteen, and it hasn't been easy. I would like to tell them that the most important thing about working is earning your self-respect. I wonder if they have self respect, but it doesn't appear so to me if they are standing around on a corner, looking bored, especially that early in the morning. If they were not working, I would tell them that millions of people have risked life and limb, and have traveled to America with nothing, for hopes to be able to live and work in a free market economy.

One time I was asked to leave a job. I did not know what to do, as it came somewhat unexpectedly. I made the trip to the local unemployment office, in order to utilize their job placement program. I always believe that you have to utilize every resource available while searching for work, so I was hopeful that would increase my chances of finding something. The job placement coach advised me that if he were me, he would stay at home and collect his unemployment checks instead of worrying so much. Ladies and Gentleman, that is what is WRONG with our system. I have never been so peaved at anything else in MY LIFE. I thanked him for his time, and went home and found a job within two days on my own. It was not what I wanted to do, and I was not making any money to brag about, but I was working. You, taxpayers of this State, were not paying me to sit at home and flip channels.

Sandi's Blog: Technology's Blessing: My Daddy's Blog

I want to take a moment to share with you the great gift bestowed upon me by Technology's Blessing. Tonight, I got my first lesson in Blogs!

I must admit, I am a bit behind times and sadly have not yet purchased as much as a palm pilot. What the heck is an I-Pod, anyway? Moments ago, I accessed my Daddy's Blog. (The Gog's Blog). Amazingly, there he was... Out in the open...FINALLY....His thoughts, opinions, and expressions, ranging from his avid support of free speech to his views of various myths and deep love of music. Much of which I have regrettably not known until a few moments ago. The Gog's Blog is a cherished gift to me: technology has miraculously opened the window into my daddy's soul.

My grandfather, a retired postman died when I was in my teens. I learned one profound fact about him: he loved the Atlanta Braves. I knew he cried every night before he went to bed, mourning the loss of his wife, who died many years before from diabetes. In my memories, I can still see him sitting on the edge of his bed, grasping the picture of his beloved Lucky (Lucille). He spoke to the framed photograph intimately, privately, lovingly. He told her how he could not bear to live another day without her. He could not go on. He lived without her for over fifteen years. Then, it happened and he passed. A generous, purely kind man who touched the lives of hundreds of strangers. One after the other, strangers stood at the podium, in front of the shell of what he once was. His Spirit had left hurriedly in pursuit to join his precious Lucky in eternity.

At the funeral, a bright-eyed young woman appeared through the crowd, choked back tears, weeping into the microphone sharing how he changed her life. Once, after he finished dinner at a local restaurant, he discovered his young waitress miscounted his change, giving him twenty cents too much. He immediately returned to the restaurant to return the money. He could have simply driven home, with an extra twenty cents in his pocket. What could twenty cents do for him? It would prevent him from sleeping with a clear conscience. What about the waitress? Twenty cents would prevent her till from balancing at the end of her shift... Twenty cents would have her fired. Who would feed her children?! How would she feed herself?

Alone I sat, a stranger in foreign surroundings, in a fog, contemplating life's strange events and embarrassed by my ignorance, by the chances I missed; solemnly listening to story after story about Elwood Long. I extended my hand and eagerly stepped forward hoping to meet this amazingly honest, true and generous man; A man I never knew. John Gog, my daddy, a man whom I have lived with for most of my life, has been an astounding mystery to many, including me. A brilliant, Hungarian stranger I have yearned to meet.. And, tonight, here, through the gift of technology, and a couple of keystrokes, I have gained security clearance to his classified thoughts, his mind, his opinions, his life. This gift has enabled me to realize a dream. I have the profound opportunity to meet this genius now, during our lives, and not have to wait until I am sitting at his funeral, listening to strangers' stories.